Why leave can feel stressful
Plenty of people have vacation days they avoid using. The reasons are understandable: a heavy workload, worry that things will fall apart, guilt about leaving colleagues, fear of coming back to chaos, or a sense that being away looks like a lack of commitment. In some workplaces the culture really does discourage leave.
Preparing well takes much of the sting out. A break is easier to take when you know your work is covered and what you will return to. This article offers general ideas. Leave rules, pay and expectations differ by employer and country, so check your own contract and company policy.
Pick the time deliberately
When you can choose, a little thought helps.
- Look at the work calendar. Avoid known crunch points where possible, such as major deadlines or launches.
- Check with the people who depend on you. Colleagues, clients and family may have their own constraints.
- Give notice early. The sooner others know, the more time they have to plan.
- Book the days before you talk yourself out of it. Putting dates on the calendar makes the break real.
Be realistic about length. Many people find that a break of several days gives more recovery than a single day, but a long weekend is better than nothing, and what you can take depends on your situation and budget. A break does not have to involve travel; time at home can be restful if you protect it.
Prepare a handoff
Much of the dread comes from not knowing what might go wrong. A clear handoff reduces that. It does not need to be elaborate.
A simple handoff note might include:
- What is in progress. The status of each active item and the next step.
- What might come up. Likely questions or requests, and how to handle them.
- Who covers what. Names for each responsibility, confirmed in advance.
- Where things are. Links, locations and any passwords handled through approved, secure means, not pasted into a note.
- What can wait. Items that can safely stay until you return.
- Who to contact if truly urgent. And what counts as urgent.
Giving your cover person a short walk-through usually saves more time than a long document. Good work handoffs also make it easier for colleagues to step in without feeling lost.
Set expectations before you go
People tend to respect time off when they know about it clearly.
- Tell your manager and key colleagues the dates and who covers for you.
- Write a useful out-of-office message that says when you are away, when you return and whom to contact. Out-of-office replies that name a backup person help senders get what they need without waiting.
- Decide whether you will check in. If you can, choose not to. If you must be reachable, agree on a narrow channel and a short window instead of leaving it open.
- Quiet your notifications. Remove work apps from your phone for the duration, if your employer allows it.
If your role truly requires some contact, consider limiting it to a single brief check once a day or on specific days, so the rest of the time is free.
Deal with the guilt and what-ifs
Some worries are about work, others are about how you will be seen. A few thoughts that people find helpful:
- Systems that fall apart the moment one person leaves are a sign the system needs backup, not that you should never go.
- Most tasks can be delayed or covered for a few days.
- Taking leave you are entitled to is a normal part of working, not a favor.
- If your workplace does punish people for taking leave, that is useful information about the workplace, though it may not be a fact you can change quickly.
It can also help to tell yourself in advance that you may not solve every issue. Some small thing will probably go slightly wrong, and it will probably be fixable.
Ease back in
The return can undo the benefit of the break if it is a flood of messages. A few steps soften it:
- Keep your first day light. If you can, leave it free of meetings and focus on catching up.
- Triage the inbox. Sort for what is urgent first and scan the rest. A calm approach to an inbox backlog works better than trying to read everything in order.
- Ask for a summary. A brief update from your cover person saves you from reading every thread.
- Reset your priorities. Take an hour to review what matters most this week before diving into requests.
Some people also block the first morning back on their calendar in advance, to protect that time.
When time off is not possible
Some people cannot take much time off because of the type of job, staffing levels, money or caregiving duties. If that is you, look at what is available, even small versions: a long weekend, a few evenings with nothing scheduled, or a short stretch with limited contact. Where leave is available but you feel unable to use it, consider raising workload and coverage with your manager, since a role that cannot function without you for a week is a risk for both of you.
If you feel persistently exhausted or hopeless even after time away, consider speaking with a doctor or other qualified professional.